Stress

I am full of stress because of the coming holiday. I have a lot of worries about those 2 weeks, because of my depression.
I know when I have time to relax and there is no pressure, I will be irritated and feel very angry. This year I want to have a nice and calm holiday for my family, but that gives me a lot of tension.
My wife told me that I must relax and think about it and don't make any scenarios about what could happen.
In my heart I want to stay home and don't go. I don't want to stop the daily routine, because I am afraid what wil happen with my mental status.
But, my family want me to go with them so I must be prepared.